Every Wednesday, Coach Felicia prescribes a 40-minute hillclimb at a designated heart rate. This is best done on the "four-lane." For the non-Fresans, this road is an awesome seven-mile climb at about a 10% gradient.
Mistake #1--teaching two spin classes back-to-back
So, off I go up the gradient. My legs were heavy and my enthusiasm was low to moderate. Dark clouds were looming over me, and I was destined to get pelted with hail on my ride. Twenty minutes into the climb and my legs were still heavy and I could not get my HR (heart rate) anywhere near my target.
I kept hearing, "Loser" over and over in my head. I resigned to the fact that my legs were not going to get any better, so I deserved to be punished for my inadequacies. "I'll go all the way to the top and get a Snickers bar at Cressman's." (Cressman's is a market at the 6,000' mark). This hour climb should be the perfect penalty for not being able to adhere to Coach's directions.
Mistake #3--piles of snow
At the 3,000' level, there was almost one foot of snow along the road. The views were amazing! Drivers would roll down their window, cheering me on. Several, blasted friendly honks. A Cal-Trans snowplow did a double take in his rear view mirror, as he passed me. All of these responses further encouraged my poor decision making.
Mistake #4--crap loads of snow
The ground was crackling under my tires and I believed this to be ice. I kept plugging along, knowing that the Holy Grail was around the corner (the Snickers bar). Once inside Cressman's, the store owner remarked how dangerous it may be going back down the four-lane. I bought the King-Size Snickers and cracked off a corner of the frozen reward. I grabbed the Penny Saver newspaper and shoved it into my jacket. Thirty-two degrees mandated several issues.
Mistake #5--f**king freezing decent
Since there was so much slush on the roadside, I kept the brakes on, going no faster than 15 mph. (usually, I can fly down at 45+ mph) The cold was biting. Miserably friggin' cold!! My patooties were frozen and my fingers were the coldest I have ever experienced. This was the worst punishment I could have inflicted on myself, since I thrive in the 100+ degree weather.
Back into my warm truck, I blasted Kid Rock on the way home, thinking, "Denise you are not a loser.....you're one tough chick!"